Chapter Two: Streamer, your substitute poison strategy is indeed formidable.

Você Não Pode Ser um Treinador de Pokémon! Suco não é pombo. 2703 words 2026-08-05 02:16:43

Avoiding the crowd heading for the cafeteria, Xia Chi returned to the dormitory.

Because this world included the existence of elves, its productivity was more advanced than in his previous life.

Naturally, even the essentials of daily life had been elevated by more than one level.

The dorms at Shanghai University, where Xia Chi stayed, were apartment-style units with two bedrooms and one living room.

The comfortable living conditions even made him feel that the university dormitory of his former life had been nothing more than a kennel.

Lying in the quiet comfort of his bedroom, Xia Chi once again awakened the system.

On the blue translucent screen, several entries stood out with unusual clarity.

Elf.

Bond.

Items.

Were these the system’s main functions?

Xia Chi tried tapping the first two buttons, but there was no response.

He was not surprised. He had not yet captured any elves, so it was only natural that nothing was shown.

Still, Xia Chi was an old hand at this sort of thing and could more or less guess what these buttons were for.

Bond was the heart of the Chessboard Wars game.

When units sharing the same trait appeared together, they could grant powerful combat or economic bonuses.

In a world of Pokemon, that probably meant elves with the same type or the same trait could form some kind of bond.

As for what the bond effect actually was, he would have to wait until he obtained his first starter before investigating it.

The Items interface displayed the three things he had pulled from the Prismatic Orb earlier.

Artifact Forge: Use it to choose one of three powerful artifacts, equipable only by captured elves.

Chosen Emblem: Use it to make an elf into a “Chosen Elf.” A chosen elf has additional bond levels and special effects. Usable only on captured elves.

Basic Equipment Forge: Use it to choose one of three basic items. Two basic items can be combined into a completed piece of equipment.

“Just as I thought. Not much different from what I imagined—basically a Pokemon-modified Chessboard Wars system,” Xia Chi mused. “But the exact effects can wait until I’ve captured my first elf.”

——

After dinner, Xia Chi opened his computer and began today’s work.

“Hello, hello? Can you hear me? Aloha?”

As soon as the stream went live, many viewers poured in one after another.

“Great, it’s the cursed streamer. My anorexia is saved!”

“Streamer, streamer, your Substitute Stall Poison strategy really is strong, but it’s still too demanding to pilot. Do you have any simpler yet stronger teams to recommend?”

“Teacher Shui, why aren’t you using a camera again today? What am I supposed to do with my flight ticket?”

“Hurry up and update the Pokemon Mythical Legends series! Without that electronic side dish lately, I can’t even enjoy my meals!”

“A fan coming from the Iono supertopic. Who is Shuiya?”

“......”

Xia Chi’s streamer name was Shuiya, taken from splitting the character for “Chi.”

As a rising video creator and game streamer, he had a fair number of active fans.

Especially after he had clashed with Iono, the wildly popular Gym Leader of the Paldea region, and tormented her with Substitute Stall Poison until she went red-faced and ended her stream, his popularity had surged dramatically.

Of course, an idol streamer’s fanbase was bound to include a few people who were not entirely normal.

Amid the otherwise harmonious and lively atmosphere filled with jokes and memes, there were also a few jarring comments.

“If you like using such filthy tactics, then even if an Onix used Earthquake in your house, it would only shake one person.”

“You don’t even dare turn on a camera. Is it because your looks are uglier than your tactics?”

“You’re not fit to be a streamer at all. I’m unfollowing you!”

“Apologize to Iono right now, or our cheering squad has plenty of strength and methods!”

Wait, where had these trolls come from?

You people are ruining Marnie’s reputation!

Xia Chi, who was used to glancing at the chat after starting his stream, was speechless, and casually banned a few accounts spamming trash talk.

It was not that he was furious over the insults; Xia Chi had never cared about such negative comments.

His household register really did only have one page.

This kind of attack was like trying to strike a Ghost-type Pokemon in close combat: it could do absolutely no damage.

The main point was that his stream was all about harmony and joy. He could not let these rubbish comments ruin everyone else’s viewing experience.

As a Pokemon trainer, I may not be professional, but when it comes to livestreaming, no one understands it better than I do!

After handling things simply, Xia Chi launched Pokemon: Road to Champion.

Strictly speaking, this game was not only about team building and battles; it also placed considerable emphasis on collecting and training Pokemon.

Raising a top-tier account required a huge investment of money or effort.

Today, Xia Chi was using his roommate Chen Zhenze’s account.

His family conditions were better than Xia Chi’s, but only by a limited margin.

So this account’s Pokemon were neither numerous nor especially high quality; at best, they were passable.

Usable, but some mainstream builds could not be assembled.

Still, Xia Chi had made his name with all sorts of bizarre tactics, so an account like this was no obstacle.

“Streamer, streamer, your Substitute Stall Poison strategy really is strong, but it’s still too demanding to pilot. Do you have any simpler yet stronger teams to recommend?”

Repeating the chat message from before, Xia Chi said, “Yes, brother, yes. There are nine teams this strong.”

Of course, nine was just a figure of speech. There were far too many filthy tactics similar to Substitute Stall Poison to count, and Xia Chi could easily pull out a dozen or twenty such builds.

Today, I’ll be teaching you extreme offense with Trapinch!

The moment those three words appeared, the stream was instantly filled with cheerful energy.

“Here we go, here we go. It’s time for the baby team segment I love most!”

“If I remember right, Trapinch should be the first stage of Flygon, right?”

“Lmao, what can Trapinch even do? Let it evolve first and come back!”

“A don’t-laugh challenge? I admit this is a little tough.”

“......”

Faced with the chat’s ridicule filling the screen, Xia Chi said nothing and simply kept building his team.

The tactical system in this world was also similar to the worldview in the anime.

To put it in a more flattering way: intense brawling and move exchanges.

To put it less politely...

“Wake up, the whole world’s understanding of Pokemon battles has dropped by ten thousand points!”

In truth, it was quite understandable. Games and reality were, after all, worlds apart.

Turn-based battles in games were constrained by elements such as base stats, move combinations, defensive synergy, and prediction.

Real battles, however, depended on the actual cultivation of the Pokemon and the trainer’s ability to command on the spot.

It could not be said that the natives did not understand tactics or team construction.

The reality was that this was not a turn-based game, and the above factors became far less important in the face of a large enough gap in strength.

But then again, Pokemon: Road to Champion was, after all, a game built on data.

Those tactics that people had overlooked were precisely the ones given a stage on which to shine.

——

“Okay, family, our lineup is complete.”

Not keeping the audience waiting for long, Xia Chi quickly finished constructing a lineup centered on Trapinch.

Hatterene, Mimikyu, Trapinch, Coalossal, Dusclops, Vikavolt.

In this ladder environment dominated by Charizard, Venusaur, Lucario, and other highly popular Pokemon, it was truly a breath of fresh air.

“Next, I’m going to go undefeated in a single game and reach Great Ball rank!”

Xia Chi made a bold declaration, then pressed the matchmaking button.